Gyan-Monsoon

Meme - Kids marks these days

Meme - Long distance relationship.

Meme - Being Judgemental

Side effects of alcohol and remedies !!! - Joke

1. Symptom: Cold and humid feet.
Cause- Glass is being held at incorrect angle (You are pouring the Drink on your feet).
Cure: Adjust glass until open end is facing upward.

2. Symptom: The wall facing you is full of lights.
Cause : You're lying on the floor.
Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor.

3. Symptom- The floor looks blurry.
Cause : You're looking through an empty glass.
Cure: Quickly refill your glass!

4. Symptom: The floor is moving.
Cause : You're being dragged away.
Cure: At least ask where they're taking you!

5. Symptom-You hear echoes every time someone speaks.
Cause : You have your empty glass on your ear and trying to drink from it.
Cure: Stop making a fool of yourself, refill your glass and place it on your mouth.

6. Symptom: Your dad and all your brothers are looking funny.
Cause : You're in the wrong house.
Cure: Ask if they can point you to your house.

7. Symptom: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in white and the music is very loud and repetitive.
Cause : You're in an ambulance.
Cure: Don't move. Let the professionals do their job!

Joke - Bong Boy

A Bengali boy in a Bus

Boy: Hot..!
Girl : Thanks 😍
Boy : Hot, homko neechy utrna hai!!
😆😆😆

Joke - Dont mess with an Indian farmer.

An Indian farmer walking through his field notices a foreigner drinking water from a pond, with his hand.

The farmer shouts, 'Arre baba, woh paani mat peena. Usme gaayein or suuwar sandas karte hai har roz !

The man shouts back, 'I'm a foreigner, I don't understand your bloody gibberish language... Speak English, you bloody Indian idiot !'

The farmer shouts back in English,

'Use two hands, u can drink more !'

:D

ainveyi - Pic of the day

Gyan - Parents; parents hi hote hain

An elderly man in Mumbai calls his son in New York and says,

“I hate to ruin your day son, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are getting a divorce; 35 years of marriage… and that much misery is enough!”

“Dad, what are you talking about?” the son screams.

“We can’t stand the sight of each other any longer,” the old man says.

“We’re sick of each other, and I’m sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Hong Kong and tell her!”

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone.

“Like WHAT???? they’re getting divorced,” she shouts, “I’ll take care of this.”

She calls Mumbai immediately, and screams at the old man, “You are not getting divorced. Don’t do a single thing until I get there. I’m calling my brother back, and we’ll both be there tomorrow.

“Until then, don’t do a thing, DO YOU HEAR??” and she hangs up.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. “Okay”, he says,

“It’s all set. They’re both coming for Eid and paying their own airfare!!”

MORAL:

No man / woman is busy in this world all 365 days.

The sky is not going to fall down if you take few days LEAVE and meet your dear ones.

OFFICE WORK IS NOT EVERYTHING IN LIFE and MONEY MAKING IS NOT EVERYTHING IN LIFE. AFTER ALL WE WORK FOR SOMEONE ELSE’S DREAM.

Joke in a Pic - Pathaan ki kya galati..

Joke - Women will always be Women !!!

Once a Girl Went to An Electronic Shop With Anger &
Threw Her New Laptop On The Desk At A Person From Whom she Bought.

She Told The Salesman That You Have Cheated Me,
I Cannot Transfer File From My Previous Laptop..!!

Salesman : Madam, Can You Please Try In Front Of Me..??

This Is What She Did :

1) Right Clicked The Mouse On The File Which She Wanted To Transfer & Selected CUT Option.
2) Disconnected The Mouse From That PC.
3) Took That Mouse Carefully & Connected It To The Other PC Where She Wanted To Copy That File. .
4) Right Clicked The Mouse & Selected The PASTE Option.

Salesman DIED..!

I'm Back..!!

Joke - Insult ki Had

Girl: mummy kya mai beautiful dikhti hu?

Mummy: apne bf se puch le...

Girl: bf nahi hai...

Mummy : to khud hi samajh jaa ab...

:D :) :p

Gyan - Naya Sanskar

नया संस्कार:
यदि आपके घर कोई पधारें
तो उसे पानी पूछने से पहले कहिये "

प्रणाम,
लाइये में आपका फोन चार्जिंग
पे लगा दूँ "

कसम से दिल से दुआ देगा सामने वाला..... फिर पूछो .... आपको वाई फाई .... का पासवर्ड दे दू ... तो खुशी से  पगला  जायेगा !
:D :)

Joke - Iron Man

I Saw contact called
 "Iron man"
on my wife's  phone.
Little terrified , I asked her.
She said,



 "Istri walo bhaiyyo!"
:D

Gyan - Logic of Indian parents

Indian parents logic
You are an AWAARA if you step outside of your home..
and NIKAAMA if you stay inside *eyesrolling* :S

Thanks@shaitaan for sharing this.  :)

Joke: Husb/Wife phone conv.

Husband: Call Me Shonu
Wife: mera Shona Babu....
Husb: arrrrre.,,,Call Me Sweetheart
Wf: my sweetu ... Sweetheart.
Husb: ufffff ...... Call Me Honey..
Wf: Mera hannu darling ...

Husb : O pagal aurat, call kar mujhe, balance nhi hai
Wf: Oho ... ok ok... Abhi karti hu
=D=))
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Pj: 'shubhasya sheegram'

This morning i called my spiritual guru for advice. Guru said 'shubhasya sheegram'.

I heard it as 'subah se seagram' and obeyed it promptly!

Damn.... I have been lying talli all day :p
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Joke:- Intellegent Hubby

Biwi ne Husband ko call
kiya:- Kaha ho tum ??
Husband:- Tumhe
wo Jwellery shop yaad hai
jahan tume ek diamond ka
set pasand aaya tha aur tab mere pass itne paise
nahi the ki main wo tumhe
leke de sakun..
.
.
Wife :- Haan yaad hai... Husband:- Phir maine
tumse
kaha tha ki ek din main
tumhein wo
zaroor leke dunga..
.
Wife bahut khush hote hue: Haan Haan ji, mujhe
achche
se yaad hai..
.
.
.
. . Husband:- Main uski baju
wali
shop me baal katwa raha hu
thoda late aunga..

:)
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Gyan - Happy Husband

ALL Happy Husbands Behave Like Amir Khan In Ghajini -

Biwi Ki Sunte Hain,
Samajhte Hain,
Aur.
15 Minute Ke Baad Sab BhooL Jaate Hain...

:)
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